It was a beautiful day in Newport Beach, the small temple was glistening in the sun, the wind was blowing hard. After the ceremony I came outside the Temple doors with my husband. We waved, we were genuinely happy, the family and friends that could be there was there, and I was grateful about that. I kept a promise to myself to marry in the Temple, but at what cost I wondered. I have questions and regrets about this decision. I would have done things so differently had I been given the chance to marry and have a reception and then get sealed a few hours later. I would have been overjoyed with having my family, and my Grandfather especially be able to witness us make vows to each other, and to God, before we made the covenants in the Temple.

I did my best to be inclusive, I had a ring ceremony, the bishop spoke words, and it was a nice luncheon, instead of an all out dinner.

I believe this Temple sealing policy needs to change. For many reasons, not just for converts but for those who have family who is and who is not members of the church. To have my Uncle witness my sealing and sign the marriage certification was wonderful, it really feels wonderful to have had him as one of my witnesses, and my husband’s uncle signed too. However I would have loved to have had a ceremony outside the Temple first, for everyone to see and witness the event with me.

With questions circulating my mind about equality, if this policy had been recalled, and stopped before I got married, I would have had a little less questions running through my mind. I would have had something else to plan yes, but I feel overall it would have helped all of us in the end to have had a much more inclusive wedding, especially for my cousin who loved being a flower girl but never really got to be a flower girl. I would have had more time to study and reflect what I wanted in the ceremony and spent less time worrying about what the reception would be like which caused more friction and heartache then it needed too.

My feeling overall is to ask the Lord if this policy be from him, and to stop this policy if it isn’t, and let us celebrate our marriage civilly first, then choose the date and time of our sealing with in a few hours or a few days of being married.